5/15/2005

If I Only Had A Brain...

One day I will get my brain back. For now it is being held hostage by a 25 year old editor who insists that the six pages of revisions she is requesting on my manuscript are just little "tweaks" and will be soooo easy to fix!

No. Not if she is holding my brain hostage, it won't.

And don't think I believe for a second that she will give me my brain back on Wednesday when the corrected manuscript arrives in her office, blood, sweat and tear stained.

Nope. She'll just pass what's left of my sanity on to my other editor who will hold it hostage until I send her a synopsis and the first three chapters of the book that's due in September. I have two more weeks to do this!

In the meantime, I still have to clean out the basement, pack it up and put the house on the market...and work, and cook and blah, blah, blah!

But it would be so nice to have my brain back. Think of all I could do with it! I hear brains are right slippery little things...maybe I could use it to polish the kitchen floor...or grease my way out of the sticky situations I sometimes find myself in. Brains are useful.

Clearly I need mine back.

Just think how much better this blog would be if written by someone with a brain.

Wonder if my publisher would consider giving me a loaner brain? My car broke down Friday night and the dealership gave me a loaner vehicle. You think a brain is any less essential than a car?

Maybe old Hairless Go-rilla down in Hot Lanta'll lend me some of his gray matter...you know, just enough to get me through until I raise the ransom or finish the revisions...

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